albalark (albalark) wrote,

Oh Noes, Not Again!

 I *should* be in my sewing room, working on Miss M's dress, or working my way through Mt. Washmore, or working on my rebuttal letter for the Molecular Cell paper that got rejected.  But am I doing any of those things?  It is to laugh.  Instead I am reading Friends pages.  Among said pages is the snape100 community, which is offering this challenge:

 Challenge #359: "Snape and 'N'"    This week's challenge - the second in a series of five - is to write a drabble that pairs Severus Snape with somebody (of your choosing) from the 'N' section in the Wikipedia list of HP Characters.   Romantic or erotic pairings preferred, but if you really can't see Snape with anybody in the 'N' section (or anybody at all), feel free to define "pairing" in some other way.   

This, of course, lead me to look at the 'N' section, and when I did, THIS is what happened.  (You all are a bad, bad influence. XD)

The first time it happened, Severus was certain it was a coincidence.  He'd been using his Animagus form for years to swiftly and silently prowl the corridors for miscreants.  He had used this little secret to great effect, and had rarely encountered her before, but suddenly, wherever he was, she turned up: by Gryffindor Tower, in front of the statue of the humpbacked witch, lurking by the prefect's bath.

She pretended not to notice him, but there was something almost alluring about her that made him pause before continuing on his rounds, baffled as to what could be affecting him thus. 

And now she was here in the Astronomy Tower, pretending no longer.  She cast him a come-hither glance, making throaty little growls which made his blood heat, and writhed in sensual abandon on the floor as the moonlight streamed over her.  The sight transfixed him.  How had he not noticed her beauty before?  And then he caught it - the seductive scent which rose from her supple body.  His mind was bewitched, his senses ensnared.  He was overwhelmed by an answering yearning and began to stalk toward her, intent on taking was she was so blatantly offering, when a strong breeze blew through the tower.  The luscious scent dimmed and suddenly he realized what he was about to do.

Horrified, he regained his human form and fled down the steps, not stopping until he was safely back in his dungeon rooms.  After he stopped shaking, Severus rummaged through his potions stores and grabbed a large yellow bottle.  Then he stormed over to his fireplace and grabbed a handful of Floo powder and threw it in.

"Filch!" he bellowed.

The bleary-eyed caretaker appeared a few moments later.

"Is is Peeves again, Professor?"

"No."  He spoke against clenched teeth.  "It's your damned cat!"  He thrust the bottle through and into the hands of the bewildered Filch.  "And if you can't remember to put this in her food once a month, I'll take her to a Muggle vet and have her spayed!"

Tags: dunderheadedness, fic, the ebil
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